And your gang will fly on.

Cutting right to the chase is unusual for me. I’m wordy. I beat around the bush. I use long words, I’m not sure why. I use them without thinking, knowing what they mean but struggling to explain what they mean to others. I’m doing it again, being wordy.

So it should come as no surprise to learn that I’m pretty terrible at communication. Especially when it comes to communication with my husband, the person who is the closest to me in my life, the most important person to me and has been pretty much since we started dating in 1996. My way of telling him stuff has traditionally been for me to just assume he can pluck the information out of my head.

I also do a great line in sulking. Many times Elia has, sensing something is wrong, asked me ‘What is wrong?’. My frustrating response, ‘Nothing.’ This means ‘you should already know’.

Its quite funny I’m like this because Elia usually tells you how he sees it, and is not concerned if you don’t like the message! Whereas I get all worked up about how I assume the other person might feel about what I’m about to say, that it becomes really difficult to just spit it out.

What I’ve been learning lately is, communication is probably the most important thing ever in any relationship, and even more so when one of you has Parkinson’s. I’ve got to strive not to say I’m fine when Elia asks if I’m ok. I’ve got to work on facing stuff and being honest. Because we’re in this together, its not just me figuring this out, it is me and Elia, every day, with our kids, in our house. If I want or need something I have to say it.

I have just discovered a new podcast about Parkinson’s that I really like on Podbean called PDConnect by husband and wife Chad and Tonya Walker (Tonya is a person with Parkinson’s). I listened to an episode where they interviewed Dr Soania Mathur (‘Parenting with Parkinson’s – Challenges & Opportunities’ http://pdconnectpodcast.com/parenting-with-parkinsons-challenges-opportunities/) who is living with Parkinson’s and has done a lot of advocating for the Parkinson’s community. I could really relate to a lot of what they said. I especially heard and agreed with their message that communication as being the number one important thing that you need to do well to navigate these waters.

Elia has been telling me this for years, but I only hear it when someone other than him says it. Sorry love, I am a flawed individual. Even when I see my flaws and call them out, I still don’t change. But I’m seeing this communication thing now, I’m working to understand how to do it, and I’m calling it out, onto the stage, to sing and be a star.

Which reminds me of an amusing anecdote from today… I was hustling my kids into the car after a failed trip to the mall, which was in the process of ending in disaster as The Three Year Old was screaming at the top of her lungs. And Luka goes “Hey look Mum!”, and points at the pavement where someone has created a big chalk-drawn message that says “Use your voice!”

Yip. On to it.

21 thoughts on “And your gang will fly on.”

  1. Prtty nicce post. I just stumbled upon your weblog aand wanted to say that I have really enjoyed surfing around your blog posts.
    In any case I’ll be subscribing to your rss feed and I hope you writye again soon!

  2. Have you ever considered writing an ebook or guest authoring on other sites?
    I have a blog centered on the same ideas you discuss
    and would love to have you share some stories/information. I know
    my visitors would appreciate your work. If you are even remotely interested, feel free
    to send me an e-mail.

  3. Woah! I’m really digging the template/theme of this site.
    It’s simple, yet effective. A lot of times it’s challenging to
    get that “perfect balance” between user friendliness and appearance.

    I must say that you’ve done a fantastic job with this. In addition,
    the blog loads very quick for me on Opera. Outstanding Blog!

  4. I’m leaving a comment here to see how the comment redirect works with Yoast Comment Hacks, as described on this page:
    I don’t like relying on third-party tools, because if something happens to them one day, all of our comments would be lost forever. So I’m sticking with the native WordPress commenting system for the time being.

  5. By staying on top of these current trends – and using a tool like Evernote – you can keep track of hot topics, what you agree or disagree with, and constantly generate blog topics.
    “I find that reading and commenting on other blogs is a good daily discipline to help me keep abreast of what is happening in my industry and keep my brain engaged on the topics I write about. It’s also great writing practice!”

  6. Great post. I was checking continuously this blog and I’m impressed!
    Very useful info particularly the last part 🙂 I care for such information much.
    I was looking for this particular info for a very long time.
    Thank you and good luck.

  7. Hi! This post couldn’t be written any better! Reading through this post reminds me of my previous
    room mate! He always kept talking about this.

    I will forward this write-up to him. Pretty sure he will have a good
    read. Many thanks for sharing!

  8. Very good written article. It will be a good support to anyone who utilizes it,
    including me. Keep doing what you are doing can’t wait to read more posts.
    very nice article

Leave a Comment